Laughter Can Distract You From Yourself

Every 4 weeks I visit a waxing salon to get my face, armpits, and downstairs cleaned up. Every 4 weeks I struggle with the embarressment and disgust I feel over my large C-section scar/ akward abominal scar/ strange bellybutton scar from the many surgeries I needed to put my insides back to good after having my daughter.

I see a great gal, she laughs with me instead of giving me that “no stop it, your beautiful” speech. It’s truly refreshing to have someone agree your front side doesn’t exactly look like the norm. Today, in her adoring smile, she said “you look amazing with your clothes on.” I nearly peed myself laughing. She knew just what to say to lighten my awkwardness and make feel comfortable.
I wish all humans were so kind. Thank you friendly neighborhood waxing lady, I’d be lost with out you.

Side note, my daughter was worth every scar. I wouldn’t change a thing.

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I Hate That The Number Matters

I’m 38 (so close to 40). 5’2″(with my shoes on). I wear a size 10 pant (31 in a fancy brand). My shoes are a 6.5 (small feet make for poor balance, but a great selection at the store). I’m 148 lbs (on any given day could be 154 lbs, I get super bloated). I know it shouldn’t, but some of  these numbers bother the hell out of me.

The 38 thing really doesn’t, it’s only when doctors start talking about the new an exciting things that have to be done because I’m aging, then I’m bothered.

5’2″ well, that’s a tough one. Somedays short is where it’s at, other days I’m spending $200.00 to get my new pants taken up. I’d rather be spending $200.00 on more pants, maybe a top.

Size 10, now there is where we hit complicated. The world media is telling me I should be a size 4. My very wide shoulders and hips are saying nothing smaller than an 8 for me. It’s enough to drive me crazy. I’ve learned to ignore the numbers in my clothing, it’s better that way.

My only sadness I have around my 6.5s is if they were more like 7.5s would I be less clumsy, just a thought not a complaint.  🙂

148 lbs is where I loose it, I know if I feel good in my clothes the number shouldn’t matter, I hate that the number matters! For years I obsessively weighed myself each morning. The out come of my day sometimes rode on that number. I had to brake up with my scale, it’s been freeing. But I’m back on the crazy train.

I sometimes wonder what it would have been like to have lived in the Marlin Monroe era where curvy and mature were sexy and sought after.

I was out with a friend recently, so excited to see her, when it came time to order she order veggies, she is a vegan, and I ordered a fish dish and we each ordered wine. No apps, we passed on the bread, the waiters response was “Watching what we eat ladies”, he had the biggest grin on his face, as if he’d just won a round of trivia pursuit. What an ass! So two sized 10 women ordering delicious fish and veggies gets perceived as two big ladies who need to drop a few lbs. I had to dig deep not to tell him to shove it. “NO”, was my brilliant response. It’s a hard truth to swallow that 5’2″, size 10 women are considered to be large. I believe if we had ordered apps, bread and big meals he probably would  have  thought to himself  “those big ladies need to ease up on the intake”. It shouldn’t be this way. There is no way around  hearing peoples perceptions or opinions, but I would love it if those perceptions and opinions had a broader scope on women’s body types.

I’m sad that my struggles will one day be my daughters (efforts and fingers crossed it won’t be). I wish the ideal women was portrayed larger and curvier than a 12 year old boy. Slender and svelte, I am on your side. Tall, tight and toned, I get it, that is beautiful. But could short and wide join the ranks of ideal beauty, PLEASE.

P.S.

We were both, my friend and I, wearing fantastic outfits, our hair and makeup was flawless. That waiter has a lot to learn on how to get better tips. The art of giving compliments should be his next college course.

Quitting VS. Moving On

Quitter!

It’s all to often when we change direction in life and exit the “something” we are trying, someone calls us out on it, Quitter! We seem to scramble to make excuses why we are not quitters and in fact we had good reason to move on from our endeavor.

Here are a few of my recent Quits or were they?

1.I blindly signed up with a business coaching group. I believe there is much for me to learn and in my hast for help I fell quickly into the “don’t ask any question, just giver her my money, she said she has a solution” category. Now with that said I have learned a ton from this woman and she has helped my salon business tremendously, but what she is selling isn’t where I see myself in the future, ergo I’m not working to my potential and I’m not following instructions. I’m taking what I can and making the projects happen, but not how she is instructing us. This is a costly design, Quitter! Maybe so, who’s to say really….

2.I started counting calories, I did great for months, lost some weight, was feeling so good. What happen you ask, I got busy, stressed, not enough hours in the day, blah blah blah. Plain and simple I quit, I quit on the task, I quit on myself and I quit on the purpose of being healthier and happier with my own body. Boooo, Bad me. This is a clear case of Quitting, so I began again and I will do it better this time because I recognize my triggers that stopped me, this time I will move (trip) past them and work towards my goals and not focus on my failures. Focus on the success, how small they maybe. Calorie counting I love you! I may quit again, who knows, but each time I start, and I will start again it will get easier to move away from the quitting pattern and follow through to triumph.

3. I recently was given a health warning, my gut isn’t good and needs a reset. The Master Cleanse was suggested and after researching it I gave it a go. Well I made it 2 days, they suggest 10. The vomiting and nausea got my questioning, where is the love? The headache and dizziness sent me to google, what is an alternative to what I was doing. Start eating food again, ahhh simple, I like that. I quit the cleanse (10day food fast). Quitter! or am I:) I have an awareness now that I didn’t before and I learned a ton about where I should take my food consumption for my gut issues. When faced with my quitting the cleanse I didn’t turn to my standard oreo for comfort, I went to problem solving and eating vegetables.

Do you see what I’m saying… When is it quitting, giving up and when is it moving on for the greater good of your self, your life.

What a horrible feeling to look in the mirror and face the hard truth that when the going gets tough I hightail it for the OREO’s and excuses. I hate that feeling, but today I didn’t take it there. I didn’t go to “Quitter Land”, today I went straight to moving on, today I made the connection that I tried, things don’t always fit at the moment. These things can be tried again in the future. There is no one grading you on any of this.  I only answer to me and I have to do what’s right for me. (Only then will it all be right with the universe)

 

 

My Big Girl Pants are Giving Me a Wedgie

It all starts with a thought, an idea that will propel my business forward. Then the next thing I know I’m overwhelmed and begging for it to be over. I believe I have a sickness LOL, not really. These ideas come to mind and if I don’t act on them they keep me up at night. They nag at any remaining space in my thoughts till I just have to find  away to make these ideas happen.

~Join a business building group! Why not, I can fit it in somewhere. Who knew there would be weekly task that would push me so far out of my comfort zone I’d need a map to get back.

~Salon expansion! Sure, so easy to add a third chair to 230 sq. ft. It was 6 days of living hell and it looks amazing. Yup the phone hasn’t found a new home yet, but it will along with all of the other loose ends. Some how it all seems to come together.

~Raise my soon to be 4 yr old, she’ll never remember I was to busy for her, right… I thank my lucky stars I’ve got the flexibility to change my schedule to be with her more. Starting that in August, I promise.

~Of corse it’s time to hire an assistant at the salon. Lets go out and give talks to the local hair dressing schools so we can find the right person for sugar.  Please let the girl we like want the job.

I’ll never stop pushing myself, it’s just who I am. I’m always learning how to improve on my time management and I’m always striving to be thoughtful about how my days are spent. One things for certain my big girl pants are giving me a wedgie this week.

I do it all for this girl:)

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Booby Pins And Hair Pins Are Different

Bobby pins are the work horse of hair dos. Paired with hairspray bobby pins are unstoppable. So how come your Mom never showed you how to use them? Why is it my hairdresser never mentioned it?
Sometimes we don’t get answers because we don’t know the question to ask. Your Mom probably never used them or maybe was plagued by them in her youth. Your hairdresser most likely has made the assumption you know what a bobby pin is and how to use it.
Bobby pins can be found at the drugstore in the hair accessories section. They will most likely cost 3 dollars for a package.
Great so now what?
Using bobby pins does take practice, but should be a quick study.
Bobby pins need friends, a support team if you will. Where one goes a second must cross it to ensure a secured hair do. Clarification… the bobby pins should look like an “X” after you’ve slid them both into your hair. Once you’ve got the hang of this step modification can be made to your “X”.
Now is where the hair pin comes into play. Hair pins are the backup crew. They can smooth out or tuck in any bits of your hair do that hasn’t cooperated and laid nice against your head. These pins should be anchored with existing bobby pins. You tubing a “how to” on this will be a game changer.
MY Basic pinning of any hair, even if it’s just to put a few side pieces back.
1.Start with a small section of hair.
2.Hairspray the section then curl or twist it.
3.Hold the hair where you would like it to be then pin it in place with a bobby pin.
4.Cris cross your placed pin with a second pin to form your “X”.
5.Respray with hairspray. Yes folks more hairspray!
Hopefully this helps get you started down the path of hairdo success.
Practice makes perfect, luckily with hair you don’t have to be perfect.
Happy pinning!